Like a lot of other women I know and have grown up with, I’ve spent a lot of time in my life trying to find validation in people and things that I thought would make others see my value. Having long beautiful hair was one of them. Ever since I can remember, i’ve struggled with beauty and not feeling as pretty as my peers. I used to ask myself as a child “why wasn’t i born with pretty hair like her or her?” Like many others, I thought that pretty hair made you beautiful, not realizing that pretty hair really has nothing to do with being a beautiful person!
I got my first perm when I was about 6 years old, and this started my obsession with having “good hair”…Whenever my roots would start to get nappy, I had a fit! And this all started in the first grade! Its sad to think that a six year old could look in the mirror and hate what she saw and already be brainwashed by what society deemed as beautiful. Yes, at six years old, young girls can idolize the same things that their parents do.
A year ago, I made the choice to go natural and leave the creamy crack in the past, and i can honestly say that its been the best decision i could have made for myself. I made the decision that i would no longer wish for or try to create an image that just was not who i was as never would be. I wanted to break apart from the crowd.
Being natural may not be that big of a deal to others, but for me it was a chance to revolutionize myself from what I thought was “the norm”, a chance to finally look at myself in the mirror and be happy with what i saw! I did it for that six year old girl who never saw herself good enough because her hair didn’t look the way people told her it should! Oh, and not to mention all of the health issues that are associated with creamy crack.
I’m not knocking anyone who chooses to perm their hair because at the end of the day, you have to do whats best for you! But i do think that moms often make these decisions for us at a young age because they think its the right thing to do or they are pressured into it or just lazy. I mean think about it, as soon as a little girls hair starts to kink up, her aunties and Godmothers or whoever starts criticizing her and making her think that kinky hair is bad and she needs a perm or else the world’s going to end. I feel like in the African American community, women are taught at a young age that perms and weaves are a necessity. Why not break apart from this and be different? Don’t do something just because everyone else is doing it, do it because it genuinely makes you happy!
With this being said, I love my natural hair. Since I haven’t had a perm, my hair has gotten so much thicker and its growing out of control and i’m not complaining! I have truly fallen in love with a whole new part of myself that I never knew existed!